Chai-Spiced Polenty Porridge

In the summer, I grill shit and I like corn.  Grilled Stone Fruits make a miserable man smile.  Polenta brings out my Ginzaloon roots and, of course, the corn flavor compliments all the sweet shit.  This may be an involved porridge, but if so, then don't make it.  If it ain't, then make it.  

Now is the PERFECT fucking time, in terms of the seasonality of the fruits involved and the weather is lovely for grilling.  It's things like these that make me keep wanna cook and keep eating tasty things, instead of a bullet.  HAPPY SUMMER!!!

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Whole Wheat/Buckwheat Pancakes With Stewed Mango And Blueberries

More not-oatmeal!  When I get home from work at midnight, it's completely understandable that pancakes are THE option.  I don't want regular flour, because that tastes just like jack and shit, so I took to the internet, researched alternative flours, made countless shitty pancakes and created a few bangin-ass recipes.  The following is one of them.

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Oat Friggin' Flour

The little sweetheart of a gem pictured on the right was made with Oat Flour that I produced myself.

Making Oat Flour was simple as shit.  I took some store-bought Rolled Oats, put them in my Coffee Grinder, ground them down to a fine powder, then mixed that shit into my baked oatmeal.

I used about 2-3 Tablespoons of the Flour per 1/2 Cup Rolled Oats.  Given how good this shit came out, I may have to update past Baked recipes to include the Oat Flour.  Nah, I'm too lazy and stupid to do that, but I will incorporate this into future recipes.  

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Chocolate Oatmeal Cake With Mango Friggin' Salsa

You may think this is stupid and maybe you're right, but I'm certain that if you even look back at the last hour of your life, it was filled with regrettable decisions.  If you think this might be a future bad decision, just remember that it's oatmeal and you should get over it and try new things.  It's awesome, by the way.

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Lonely Boy Granola

I'm down for some self-pity.  There's a blizzard, I'm alone, have been for a while, so I think it's time to let my eating issues fuck with me and cook food, then consume it.  This time it won't be bagels stuffed with unhealthy horseshit.  This time it'll be something better for me, so I can hide those problems and nourish them, without feeling like a bigger piece of garbage after consumption.

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